Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
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