ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
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