Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
What a dumb baby whore.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize
