In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Randomize
