so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
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