think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
