I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
it glows. i had to have it.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
Randomize
