You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
