im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
