Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
My balls are so social today.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Randomize
