you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
Randomize
