Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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