I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
