Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
