Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
