Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
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