Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
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