we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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