something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
