so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
He did a backflip because drugs
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