Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Randomize
