Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Randomize
