she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Randomize
