mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Randomize
