I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
