Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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