I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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