he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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