I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Randomize
