i jhust puked up my retainher.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
