Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
