I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Randomize
