Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Randomize
