Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
even my farts smell like vagina
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Randomize
