Welp...herpes.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
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