how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Another day, another engagement, another cat
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Sext me about skeletons
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
