dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Randomize
