brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
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