In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
please come you make the beer taste better
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize
