Where did you get a picture of my penis
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Randomize
