SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
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