Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
