This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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