I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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