How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
