ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
