I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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