I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
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