you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Randomize
