i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
